Living With A Husband Hard Of Hearing

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By Henry Hughes


Couples often look forward to the Golden Years, when money and leisure will be more plentiful and responsibilities less. However, having a husband hard of hearing can ruin the program if both partners aren't informed of the possibility of such impairment and of the challenges it may present. About half of senior marriages will encounter this problem.

We all know someone who keeps the television on so loud that any peace in the house is shattered. This is a sign of impairment; the person with the problem really can't enjoy his shows any other way. Wives who may be used to their husbands watching TV after work or during the day after retirement will find themselves both irritated and isolated if they don't have the same tolerance for high volume. There are devices to enable the partly deaf to hear without simply turning up the sound.

He gets up and heads for the table. After grace, he begins to eat - his favorite chicken fried steak! When he looks up for the salt, he sees his wife's lips moving, but doesn't hear a thing. Since he no longer hears high-pitched sounds, which includes female voices, and she's looking down at her plate, he say "What?" She sighs and says, "Nothing."

Or perhaps what she's saying is important, so she says it again, with wholly unnecessary emphasis and volume. "You don't have to shout!" he responds, and their happy meal is headed downhill fast. Counselors say that this common problem is very disruptive. They actually show women how to look directly at their husbands, pitch their voices low, and speak slowly and clearly. Only a well-informed and loving wife can accept this new approach gracefully, especially since her husband may not even notice her extra effort.

Looked at casually, this seems a minor problem, but actually it's a major one. Losing the ability for easy intercourse lowers the quality of life for all. Solutions like battery-powered aids are worth investigating before they are absolutely required. There are many different kinds and even the most perfect ones will need careful fitting and adjusting to work well.

There is also surgery, which once used to be performed mostly on children with a lifetime of impairment before them but is now not unusual among seniors. It's really worth investigating what can be done to help your spouse hear things like the grandchildren, general conversations when the family gets together, voices on the phone, and sermons in church.

Getting informed before the problem exists or becomes severe may make it easier to handle. Experts say that being blind is less isolating than being deaf. Any circulation problems, such as those caused by high blood pressure, diabetes, or heart disease, can affect the ears. It's important to learn how to protect your ears and what can be done to keep your ability to hear longer.

A wife who notices that her spouse may be losing this important ability can do a lot to educate both herself and her husband. Since many professions come with loud, continuous noise - farming, carpentry, the military, factory work, mining - men are prone to this disorder. Begin now to preserve all-important communication with your life partner.




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